OH DEAR

Oh god , i thought this would never repeat again. I cry more often than before. I'm not in the good health. I just want him to be with me. Why does this keep happening to me ?

I cant stop crying like hell. I dont feel save now. I dont eat much , I sleep often , my eyes are SEPET and reddish. I dont talk much. I even cant pay attention with something.

Every time I open my eyes from my sleep , I started to cry. Life is unfair. I need him and they took him away from me. I try to be happy but , I fake it.

Now , my life is been sabotage by one idiot person that I never know in my life and I have no one to cry on their shoulder. To tell my problems. I can't wait him for every weekends.

I look like Carrie Bradshaw after her wedding was off.

B , please. I need you. I cant describe more how much I need you.
P.S I Love You

Thanks A Lot PMR

Babeng sungguh , nasib baik ni tahun PMR. Kalau tak , jangan harap lah nak bergegas sana sini. Dengan kerja sekolah menimbun nimbun nyaa. Frust doee. Duludulu jea boleh jadi pemalas. Tahun ni , buat masa sekarang , kerja sekolah BERES. Clear wehh. Tak pernah tak hantar. HAHA

Okay okay , Najwa memang budak baik. Nak berkat cikgu. Ni tah pahal rasa cam nak buat cupcakes. Soo , tadi started pukul 4.30 and siap pukul 6 petang. Laju lah plak Najwa buat. *sedap gila wehh* Kalau ada duit lebih , nak buat Caramel Croissaint Puding. Sedap wehh. Bajet jea takde. Sedih tol.

Ada satu kerja sekolah yg macam takdapat diBERESkan jea. Tapi usaha tangga kejayaan. Stress oh melukis ! Harini first day class Najwa belajar seni. Tak pasalpasal kena tengking from cikgu sebab tak bawak kertas lukisan. =.= kteorg taktahu pun. Then cikgu ajar how to draw an apple. Then dia suruh kteorg lukis macam dia lukis. Bengong doeeee. Susah gilaaa. Dari tadi kertas lukisan ni kena koyak. T.T

Oh yeahh ! Purse kena curi haritu. IC , student card , habis semua hilang. Kimak punya pencuri. Tapi tah pahal rasa relax semacam jea. HAHA sotttt. Terpaksalah kumpul duit balik. Macam orang takde perasaan doe kena curi. Kumpul pun , baru dapat save 10hengget. Macam senget betul.

Wahai pencuri , kalau kau kenal aku and kau tengah baca blog aku yg famous kat sekolah ni , tolonglah bagi balik IC and student card aku. Tu jela yg aku nak balik. Duit tu , amek lah. Aku pun taktahu nak buat apa dengan duit tu. Nak shisha , takde kawan. Nak lepak , semua busy. Nak shopping , malas keluar. So , pulangkan kad2 aku pleaseee. Lain kali , jadi kawan aku yeah ? Aku belanja kau punyaa!

WHATEVER. Ni lah yg berlaku kat diri Najwa yg tak begitu lucky. Baru 2 minggu sekolah doe. But. Yang penting , kerja sekolah beres , dapat contact Dian on weekends andddddd dapat update blog ni diamdiam. HAHA , online pun tak wehh. Sibuk nak bagitahu dunia ni pasal apa yg terjadi kat diri.

I'm used to it now :)

I realized , by crying , he won't come back. HAHA baru nak sedar. My life are busy lately. School works , tuition , school. Blablabla. And I'm used to it dahh.

But that's the weekdays. There's no better day than on weekends , especially Saturday. The day where I can listen to Dian's voice and laughter. Chatting with him , which I can't stand thinking how is he dalam keadaan botak. HAHA that's gonna be wayyy funny when I meet him someday.

Sooo , I'm back to the old me now. Except for the busy part where I do school and tuition thingie. Whatever. I miss my friends at myspace , especially chatting with Ammirul and Matt. But , sorry guys. I'm kinda lazy to online. Heeeeee , thats all I guess. I have school works to do. =.=

My life is ?

EMPTY

I can only feels the sadness and loneliness. I'm alone. I dont feel the love surrounded me. I , just can cry. I studies like everyone. I laugh and smiles. I'm not being emo okay ? But , it still feels like nothing. Every night I'll scream and cry. Again and again and again. When can I turn like myself again ? :(

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL

Last two days , a little drama happened that stuck till this moment. I was a bit carried on by Dian leaving me , so I cry every night , thinking of him.

School :|

I woke up early , 5 pagi dah bangun. I looked at the clock at my phone. Sighed. And weirdly , I talked to myself.

"Hmmm , welcome back to school Najwa." Then I cried again. It's a new year at school , and all the loves one is gone. No more tarik rambut Dian , gossiping with Fiqa , laughing gas - Fiqri , crying at Iqseed or asking some favour to my secret agent , Boy. Everyone left.

I've got to admit , first day sucks. All the senior , I'm sorry but. You guys kinda BORING. I felt like a new kid as I don't know too much bout sesi pagi. Ikhda and Natasya are great. But all they talked is about their beloved Korean guys. What the efff ?

As the school ended , I walked home , ALONE. No more singing while walking with Fiqri. Just walked alone , wishing that I can walk faster. All I thought is just go back home and get ready for my tuition class. That all.

Quite boring huh ? That's my life now. I fake my smile. I cant even enjoy school. I fake everything. I'm miserable this year I have the same question like Carrie Bradshoe in SEX AND THE CITY. When can I laugh back ? Hmmm , -_______-